Journal #32: A Memoir

It was mid-afternoon on December 20th. I was at the bank cashing my check that I received in the mail. I was up at the window with my money in hand when I saw the man at the window next to me pull out a gun and demand that the woman behind the counter give him all the money in the bank. Naturally, she started to do as the man wished. I observed the man next to me as much as I could without him noticing. All I could think was that he was a complete loser. He looked like he was about to fall apart. He was just that nervous. I give him a brief look of disgust and turned away. He then demanded that everyone get on the floor. When the five other people who were in the bank at that time refused to comply, he grabbed a baby from a stroller and threatened to shoot it. What a lowlife. Everyone got down on the floor and he turned back to the counter where the woman was handing him a bag filled with the money from the bank. Taking advantage of this distraction, I knocked him to the floor. Probably not the best idea since he was holding a baby at the time, but I managed to grab the baby before it hit the floor. The man dropped his gun as he fell (such a novice mistake) so I scooped it up after I deposited the baby back in its stroller. He tried to jump me, but I hit him on the back of the head with the butt of the gun, and he fell like a sack of bricks. Seeing that he was unconscious, everyone started cheering and milled around as they told the story of what had happened to the policemen who had just arrived on the scene. I casually picked up the sack that held the money the man had intended to steal and walked toward the side door. Once outside, I put the money in my car, pulled of my disguise, and drove away. I learned a valuable lesson that day: I'm just too smart for all the losers in the world.